Changes of Child Custody :The Ugliest Side of Divorce

 

After the dust has settled and the divorce issues have been legally contained the bitterness often continues.  The degree of anger in the marriage coupled with the manner in which the partners separated, often predicts the degree of anger that will con tine after the divorce is final.

 

Problems arise after the legalities are final, when the non-custodial spouse decides that he/she, desires a change of custody.

 

                                How To Change Custody

 

A motion for a change of custody must be filed with the proper court.  If the parties agree on the custody change then attorneys can draw this up.  However, if there is dispute between the parties about the "best interests of the children" a haring will Be set to argue the issues.

 

 

                                    The Hazards of change

 

Many times circumstances mandate a change.  These circumstances could include drug addiction, alcoholism, or immoral behavior on the part of the custodial parent.  also, mental illness untreated such as Bi-Polar disorder or extreme depression that interferes with the ability to care for the children.

 

Ideally, the custodial parent who suffers from a condition that interferes with ca retaking would voluntarily seek help.  This might mean temporarily giving up physical custody to get straightened out.  This causes the least impact on the children and demonstrates that the children are important enough for the impaired parent to seek help.

 

However, sometimes the addiction or behaviors are so out of control that thinking on the part of the custodial parent is impaired.

 

Thus, court involvement is sought on the part of the non-custodial parent, the evidence is heard, and a judicial decision rendered.  This may turn out to be what must happen for the children's safety and well-being.  However, change is hard on children and not adviseable unless harm is being done to them.

 

Unfortunately, what often happens is that the non-custodial parent has an argument with the custodial parent and to be punishing, the non-custodial parent seeks a change of custody based on allegations (accusations) that are not substantiated.

 

                             Results of False Allegations

 

To seek a change of custody for "unclear reasons" is detrimental to the children.  It causes a battle between the parents that leaves the children feeling insecure.  There is so much fighting the children wonder who is sane enough to take care of them.

 

Legal battles are detrimental and costly to everyone and leave everyone feeling depleted both financially and emotionally.  False allegations are not likely to succeed in granting changes.  It creates needless emotional expenditure for everyone with the children paying the highest price and the attorneys getting the highest price.

 

                                Conclusion

 

If you feel that your child/children are threatened emotionally or physically by remaining with the custodial parent, file a motion for a change.  This is your duty and obligation. If you determine that your desire to ask for a change is being done out of spite or for punishment to your ex-partner, go running instead. It is reprehensible to punish children when you are having a bad day.

 

Did you Know?  Judges do punish people whom they consider to be "unreasonably litigious"--people who come to court with